Sunday, October 27, 2013

A Final Letter to my Father in Law

Yesterday we said goodbye, but I never really felt we had the chance to say hello. For years I listened to the stories of your life, you touched the hearts of many.

I never knew you during the days of the Resurrection House; the days your charismatic personality and love for God reached out to the hurting and the lost.  You were deeply loved by many.

Time changed things; you changed, everyone changed, some for the better and some for the worse.  It’s all just a part of history now.

We met not long after you had begun a new journey in your life.  You did not want your son to marry me.  There was nothing I could have said or done to meet your approval.  I want to believe that your love for your son and your own personal pain would not allow you to accept me for who I was.
You preached surrender to God but you didn't share with me the joy or the love that described you in the past.  I wanted so badly to meet that man, if even for just a day.

You continued to give of your time and money, to strangers.  Your family missed you.  You missed our wedding, the birth and adoption of your grandchildren, the holidays and the birthdays.  You missed knowing the man that your son became.   What a tremendous loss for you.

For the words and actions that hurt so deeply, I forgive you.  I hold no bitterness or anger toward you.

Today I grieve your passing; the passing of my husband’s father.  I grieve the loss that my children never really met you; their grandfather.  I grieve and have hope because even amidst the mistakes and suffering, you knew that you needed a savior.  You knew that it was not by anything you did that you could enter heaven.  You knew that by grace we can become the children of God.  We did not share much but the most important thing we shared was Jesus.

Rest in peace Bun; we will meet again and it will be new and good.  I look forward to saying Hello. 

With love,

Barbara, your Daughter-in Law

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