Doctor, doctor

Dear Dr,

Today was our first appointment with you, our new urologist. AJ is always excited to meet his new doctors and it would have been nice if you had talked to him.  He kept talking to you but you seemed too preoccupied to listen.  I know it is hard to have a medical conversation when a four year old is continually trying to talk but had you taken the time to answer him, he would have quieted down.  You are a PEDIATRIC urologist; you must be used to children in your office.

I will admit that I was not thrilled that you had never heard of AJ's disorder.  It didn't build any confidence in me when you read his chart and kept trying to say Epidermolysis Bullosa but instead it came out, "Ep...i...deeeer...mlsis   Bu...ll....usa". I had hoped you would have read the chart prior to us coming but I do understand you are busy.

I really do Ok if a doctor states that they don't know about EB but are willing to learn.  I wish you had said that. Making a plan for AJ's care when you don't have any idea what medical problems EB causes; seems foolish. I wish you had asked questions.  You appeared surprised when I told you that we were not following your thrown together plan and we were not doing the tests you suggested.  What did you expect?  You still were ignoring AJ, who at this time was yelling, "Pee, Pee" louder and louder.  He wanted to tell you his troubles.  I had told him we were coming to visit a doctor that wanted to help.

You are the urology specialist but I am AJ's EB specialist. Today I have more confidence in the nameless residents that we would meet in the emergency room should AJ have a sudden urethra blockage. We have a long way to go in our medical working relationship.

We were in your office less than three to four minutes and suddenly you were finished.  You stated you were prepared to treat AJ appropriately should he have any emergent,serious, urology complication.  It's too bad I feel less prepared after meeting you.  I only hope you remember AJ and have an interest in reading about EB.

Dr, I'm glad to be back home.  Away from your office where you appear more of a threat to AJ's medical well being rather than a member of his care team.  I am thankful that AJ does not need a medical intervention today.  I am also thankful that I have met other doctors that appeared arrogant upon their first meeting AJ and then later studied his disorder and apologized for their unwillingness to listen to us. I still have hope for you.

Don't worry about AJ (though I have no idea why you would).  He is still happy.  Your lack of words with him did not mess with his day.  He even enjoyed the wait in your large waiting room. He especially enjoyed asking (loudly) if the men that walked up to the registration desk had problems with their "Pee Pee's" too.  When we left your office the nurses were extremely surprised that our appointment was over so quickly.  They gave AJ lots of dinosaur toys and stickers.  They knew that "Pediatric" means Kids!

Until we meet again (hopefully not for a long time)

Barbara and AJ